Thursday, April 16, 2009

ANTM: a rebuttal

Sarah felt a pressing need to write a guest blog entry, so here she is:

As an avid watcher of America's Next Top Model, one of the classiest shows on television, I am offended at my father's besmirching of this fine institution's reputation. On tonight's episode, a street preacher named London was sent home for having gained too much weight, and a half-naked Brazilian man presented Tyra with a bowl of nuts as an introduction to his homeland. I frankly can't see why anyone wouldn't want to turn on their TV to this at 8:00 p.m. every Wednesday. It's taught me how to find the light and to smile with my eyes. It has taught me not to mess with bitches who don't make sense because this is a competition and they're not here to make friends.

Also, last week, a girl was astounded that one of her fellow contestants had not been practicing her poses since she was "in the fetus." That is beautiful. I hope my possible future fetuses (I am currently fetus-free) will practice poses within themselves.

Anyway, you should watch America's Next Top Model, because it's fantastic. My mom used to hate it, but now she asks me to call her in every time there's a photo shoot. My friend went to the beach once with his two best female friends and spent all day watching a marathon while it was raining outside. Kyle, whom you may recognize from comments, is a big fan.

Also, you should go and listen to "Strictly Game" by the Harlem Shakes, and then you should go and try to find the lyrics, which you probably won't be able to do, and then you should check if they're playing anywhere near you, because I've heard they're really good live.

2 comments:

Kyle said...

I have no doubt that this is the college essay that would have gotten you into Princeton.

Mark said...

Sarah responds:I believe those fine Princeton scholars would call you, Kyle, an asshat.

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