Not dead, just busy and on holiday

Several personal correspondents have emailed me with their concerns that I was in some sort of trouble because I was not answering their email messages with my usual alacrity.

I am not in trouble.

I am fine.

I'm just very busy and on holiday, the former meaning most of my hours are full, and the latter meaning I'm prioritizing other things over catching up on email.

Don't worry:  vacations don't last forever.

In lieu of a narrative blog entry

please accept this photo of five varieties of jamon iberico bellotta

Click an image to see a larger version.

and this napkin, notable for the Bourdain quote (he was on hand, assembling steamed buns full of Korean barbecue).

All of this from tonights' Barefoot BBQ event at Cayman Cookout.

Just my usual day

Today was just my usual sort of day.

Woke up after nine hours of wonderful sleep in an amazing resort (Ritz-Carlton, Grand Cayman), stepped onto the balcony, and basked in the sound and smell of the ocean.

Flew with a group of about a dozen, including chef Eric Ripert, in a private jet (courtesy of the fine folks at Craggy Range wines) to Cayman Brac, a nearby sister island, for a two-hour special lunch at the incredible Soleil d'Or resort.

Flew back to the hotel in time to do a little email and nap.

Attended a wine and art auction that culminated with what the auctioneer, who was in the luncheon group, had called her greatest challenge:  a large chocolate helicopter handmade by a local master pastry maker.

(Click the image to see a larger version.)

The man to the right provides a sense of how big this insane thing was.

Headed offline and to bed early to sleep a ton before a morning event.

Yup, just my usual day.

The view from my hotel room

is, predictably, as beautiful and perfect as ever.  Here's the version right after I hit the room in the late afternoon.

Click an image to see a larger version.

A few hours later, as I was heading to an early dinner, the view was this.

Yeah, it's pretty darn great here.

I was in the bed only three hours last night, so now it's time to crash.

More tomorrow.

Where I'm headed in the morning

Yup, it's Cayman Cookout time again.



Feel free to be jealous of me. I'm jealous of myself, and I get to go!

This evening's spam would like me to...

...skip the mattress store and order online.

...vote in a poll of the best auto brands.

...join the Dollar Shave club.

...invest in life insurance coverage for less!

and

...refinance my home.


I'm continually amazed at how little relevance my spam has to anything I am at all interested in.

My spam makers need to up their game.

Underworld: Blood Wars

is, as Kyle noted after the movie, definitely the Underworld movie I've seen most recently.

As the fifth installment in this franchise, it delivers the extremely stylized violence and look of its predecessors, gives us Kate Beckinsdale again looking amazing in her skin-tight costumes, and offers the least engaging plot of the bunch.  It is also, unfortunately, the slowest in the group, with too many stretches in which I and other viewers thought, "Too much plot exposition.  Get back to the action."

I won't try to recap the plot, because it truly is irrelevant, lots of vampire politics and werewolf plots and various folks trying to kill each other.  If you pay close attention, you'll be able to follow it all, and if you don't, you won't be much poorer for just going along for the ride.

I also won't for the most part comment on the acting, because the cast members generally do well enough with what they have--which means lots of scenery chewing--to be tolerable. I will say that Theo James can't deliver a serious line, and Lara Pulver's performance serves chiefly to make me want to go back and watch her as Irene Adler in Sherlock, where she was brilliant.

If you have seen the other four movies, or if you are just in the mood for a lot of violence, check out Underworld: Blood Wars.  Otherwise, give it a pass.

Oh, for the hardcore faithful:  yes, they tease a sixth movie.  Yes, I'll go if they make it.