Monday, February 4, 2013

On the road again: Silicon Valley, day 3

I've decided that because I cannot comment on the big things that occur on these work trips, almost all of which involve, well, work, I will instead periodically rant on the little annoying shit that gets in my face as I travel.

Such as hotel bandwidth.  I know that business hotels deal every single day with hordes of bandwidth-hungry businesspeople, but I don't care.  Those same hotels charge each of us a bloody fortune for our rooms, and then on top of that they typically levy another annoying fee (in today's case, $12.99 per day) for the privilege of connecting to the InterTubes.  For that sum, about a quarter of most folks' monthly Internet access plans, one gets bandwidth circa 2002, enough to do your email (slowly) and browse the Web (slower still), but not enough to move around big files or generally enjoy the Web as you do at home.  Hotels, we want our bandwidth!

Such as bathroom details.  I appreciate that this lovely Marriott might not want me to have to see my spare roll of toilet paper, but surely this room's designers could have found somewhere to put it that was actually in the bathroom.  But no, not these folks.  Instead, they put it on top of the closet, which you can reach only by leaving the bathroom and stepping into the entryway.  Great thinking, that bit.

Such as housekeeping staff who cannot recognize their hotel's "Do Not Disturb" signs.  That must be the problem, because why else would they knock at random times to see if you might want your room cleaned--even though that sign is hanging on your door?

Such as drivers on the 101 who despite the law, despite the traffic, despite all good sense, weave in their lanes and endanger our lives as they look down at their phones and text.  I want a front-mounted paintball gun that fires a shaped charge that upon impact with the offending vehicle spells out DANGEROUS DRIVER. 

Ah, the joys of business travel. 


Todd said...

Glad to see you back in my hood. Some day we'll have to meet!

Mark said...

Indeed. I would like that.

J. Griffin Barber said...

Ah, our local drivers: such pleasant and peaceable folk.


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