Sometimes you have to choose the wrench

WARNING: THIS POST WILL CONTAIN SOME OBSCENE LANGUAGE IN A QUOTE FROM A MOVIE AND MY SUBSEQUENT COMMENTS. STOP READING NOW IF THE F-BOMB UPSETS YOU.

Hey, I know some kids read this blog, and I generally try to avoid that language here (generally, but not always) for that very reason. Anyway, I warned you.

Last weekend, at my suggestion we all watched Good Will Hunting, a movie I quite like. Say what you will about Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, this is a strong screenplay and a fine film.

The movie is in many ways a classic SF tale, though no critic to my knowledge called it that: the young man with super powers (in this case, almost impossible brilliance and photographic memory) who can't fit in and has a tortured past struggles to find a place in the world. It's also about being abused, a topic I care about greatly. So, I was a sucker for it. Fortunately, everyone who watched it, inclulding Sarah and Scott, also liked it a great deal.

Second warning: spoiler alert. I'm going to talk about a scene near the end of the movie.

Will (Matt Damon) is talking to his court-assigned therapist, Sean (Robin Williams). They are finally confronting Will's childhood abuse. This exchange (which I transcribed from the film, which is why it doesn't exactly match the online script) occurs.

Sean: The interesting nights were when he wore his rings.

Will: He used to just put a belt, a stick, and a wrench on the kitchen table and just say "choose."

Sean: Well, I gotta go with the belt there, then.

Will: Nah. I used to go with the wrench.

Sean: Why the wrench?

Will: Cause fuck him, that's why.

If you're someone who was abused, you probably had moments like this. You should watch this movie, if only for the bit right after this exchange, when Sean says to Will, over and over, the essential truth that every abused kid needs to understand:

It's not your fault.

It really isn't. You may never be able to believe it in your heart, but it's true: it's not your fault.

As for me, well, if you want to know why anger is so much at my core, if you want to understand me at all, then you need to know this: I always chose the wrench, because fuck them. Fuck them.