Putting a plate of bacon on the counter

summons Holden faster than any dog whistle or command ever could.

After verifying he cannot simply reach up and take the lovely strips, because even he won't do that when humans are actually watching the plate, Holden begins his various approaches.

First, he tries a speed run around the kitchen island.

Click an image to see a larger version.

When his super speed fails to distract us, he moves to direct entreaties.  First up is the head tilt with mild drool.

Next, he busts outs the slightly calmer and ever so slightly sad, "surely you want me to have bacon" look.

When those fail, he moves in and applies the giant hypnotic eyes approach.

Alas for poor Holden, that evening there was no bacon, because I held firm.

I remain confident, however, that when next bacon appears on the counter, Holden will try again for the delicious prize.

Restaurant signs I can get behind

After dinner Saturday night, we were strolling the main street of Hillsborough, trying to work off six or eight of the eleven thousand calories we had each consumed earlier at Panciuto.  As we approached the front of LaPlace, a cajun restaurant, we saw this sign, which the staff had placed on the sidewalk out front. 

Click on an image to see a larger version.

The other side of the sign was equally great.

I have long wanted to try this restaurant, but it's always been too busy for me to get in. 

Now, I know I have to eat there.

After-Christmas health food

Today for lunch a group of us decided to seek food elsewhere, so after a quick consultation we headed to OnlyBurger for what was sure to be a healthy lunch. 

Oh, it so was--as you would expect from the OnlyBurger restaurant.

My main dish was the fried green tomato burger with bacon.

Click on the image to see it larger. This beast gets better the closer you look.

Yes, this monstrosity contains a burger, a fried green tomato slice, a fried egg, a couple of pieces of bacon, and pimento cheese.  Hey, it has fruit and protein; that's healthy, right?

My side dish was equally healthy:  the bacon-wrapped macaroni and cheese squares, three to an order (one disappeared down our yaps before I could snap this photo).

I love that they completely wrapped the macaroni and cheese; no bacon stinginess with these folks!

Perhaps a salad is in order for dinner....

Now that's a thank-you present

Back in the day, when I was in high school, I was pretty much what you'd expect: the smart, quasi-artsy, often mean kid with almost no friends. The cheerleaders were also what you'd expect: pretty, rich, and uniformly mean to most of us.

Except one, Lynn, who was from "our" part of town. Though she was as pretty and as intimidating as the rest of the cheerleaders, she always seemed nice, and I never saw her be mean to anyone. She had a big fan base among the non-popular kids (which is always just about everybody).

I mention Lynn because she dropped me an email a while back when she ran across my writing, and she then bought a book and sent it to me for a signature. Hers was the book that led to the humorous beach Post Office story.

Well, when she read that story and next sent me some books to sign, she not only enclosed return postage, she also sent under separate cover a thank-you gift: bacon, four pounds of Dakin Farm cob-smoked bacon.

Now, I'm not John Scalzi, and I sure don't have his blog's reader base, but I do love bacon. So, if any of you are seeking the perfect gift to thank a writer (or, at least, this writer) for something, you could do a lot worse than bacon.

It's what America's eating!

The audience thinned to three hearty souls as The Assassination of Jesse James blah blah blah ground away at our hearts, its relentless turtle-like pace rolling over us as if we were road kill in the path of a giant steamroller.

Seven hours later, the film finally behind us, the last bit of Brad Pitt's threatening madness scraped from our shirts and pants, we opened email to find a gem from John.

Holy crap! We have to make this. It was just the laugh we needed. Maybe it will save you, too.

Just don't eat it.

My other essential Christmas movie is

Bad Santa, well, actually, the unrated Badder Santa version. It's crude, rude, offensive, and outrageous, but by the end it shows its heart, and along the way you laugh madly. We gathered tonight to watch it, eat sandwiches (if you don't know the film, Granny in it is oblivious to most of the world but always offers to make sandwiches), and then ate amazing desserts from what in my opinion is the best bakery in Raleigh, Hereghty.

While grocery shopping I indulged a whim and bought a lot of bacon, which Rana was nice enough to cook. We consumed 2.5 pounds of it in our sandwiches! Everything's better with bacon.

And now back to plotting.